Halloween Jack!

My nephew Jack as a Dinofrogtiger who's very pleased with itself.

And while we're back on the subject of Halloween, the other day we noticed that someone had stuck an orange jack o'lantern Peep onto the truck's antenna. It's still there because, like Jack, it's cute.

Special Halloween Cloob #3

Raphael and I vacuumed up the real cobwebs and festooned the house with fake ones and then hosted a Special Halloween Cloob & Chili Party this past weekend (on Halloween!). If you remember, the Cloob is a beer-tasting thing in which every guest brings a six-pack (or other) of beer they'd like to try.

We missed Cloob #2, if you're curious. But I think we've made up for it.

Cloob #3 was a bit bigger and less organized than the first one, since all the original Cloobers were Halloween party-hopping the night away and therefore arrived at staggered and totally unpredictable intervals. So instead of an official "Everybody taste each beer while Erik tells us more than we ever figured he actually knew about why it tastes like that" kind of thing, we did an "Open whatever beer you want, pour some in a glass, and leave the rest on the table for someone else to try" kind of thing. And it worked surprisingly well.

The following morning while picking up bottles, I worked out a final count. We tasted a record 24 different beers. And there were another 12 kinds that we never even got to, including, regrettably, something called Horny Devil Ale and another called Piraat Ale featuring not only a picture of a pirate, but also a Viking ship.

Beer-tasting guests included: the Infected, two zombies, a sexy pirate, a fairy, a witch, a red Lego, a Mystery Woman, Swine Flu, a couple of creepy "things" wearing scary masks and brown Snuggies (as seen on tv!), two Ratt groupies on their way to a concert, a victim of the sinking of the Titanic, someone in a sparkly blue dress who bought the dress at Savers because it was cool, The Jesus (from "the Big Lebowski"), Elvis, and an aviator (Raphael: Are you a...dead aviator?" Aviator: No. Just an aviator. I didn't know there was a rule.) Oh, and Lila came as Jacob Black in werewolf form.


spooky beer line-up



Spider on a pulley-system in the bathroom. It moved when the door moved! Creepy!

















Jen is attacked by the Infected - who invited them anyway?









































Ratt groupies - and Grant



The Jesus


Becky wards off Swine Flu





I said this once before: "I have no vocabulary for this sort of thing, but I'm going to list the Cloob line-up and then I'm going to rate them on a scale of 1 to 10 for you. I'll call it Jenny's Scale of Beers (JSOB). Unless you're drawn to A. cheap domestics, B. Hefe-Weizens, or C. beers that taste like fruit, you can read 10 as being the best and 1 as being the least best. If you're partial to A, B, or C above, simply read the Scale backwards. Brilliant!"

The beers I Remember Trying:

Port Brewing Co. The Lost Abbey Devotion Ale
JSOB rating: 7.5

Four Peaks Kiltlifter Scottish-style Ale - I didn't actually try this one. I just know I like it.
JSOB rating: 7.5

Deschutes Black Butte Porter - same as above.
JSOB rating: 6

Nimbus Old Monkeyshine English-style Ale - Nimbus is a local Tucson brewery. Yes, I've had this many times while eating pizza from No Anchovies down by the U. So I didn't try it this time, but you can trust me.
JSOB rating: 9.5

Shipyard Pumpkinhead Ale
JSOB rating: 6

Avery White Rascal Belgian-style wheat ale - Hmmm.
JSOB rating: 1

Four+ Punk'n Harvest Pumpkin Ale
JSOB rating: 1

Dogfish Head Punkin Ale - I think I tried this one but I can't quite remember, so I probably shouldn't rate it.

Ska Nefarious Ten Pin Imperial Porter - I liked this one too. A lot.
JSOB rating: 9.5

Lagunitas Imperial Red - pretty good.
JSOB rating: 6.5

Ska Decadent Imperial I.P.A. - I already knew I liked this one enough to try it again anyway. Very tasty.
JSOB rating: 8.5

Chimay Ale Grand Reserve - Know I tried it. Can't remember if I liked it. Some useful beer tasting.

Rogue Chipotle Ale - Delicious! I loved this beer. Very chipotle.
JSOB rating: 9.5

The Lost Abbey Judgement Day Ale (brewed with raisins!) - dark and really, really tasty, despite the raisins.
JSOB rating 9.5

There was a German beer I didn't like at all, but I can't figure out which one it was.
JSOB rating: 1

I should also mention Erik's homebrew. It was right up there with the nine-fivers on the JSOB. It went fast.

the real reason they do what I say:

Now you know.

the sandwich diaries

This is my lunch:
Two hot dogs with mustard, mayo, relish, and onions. A bag of Cheetos. A Famous Amos chocolate chip cookie. A Mountain Dew. All for a mere five dollars at the "raise money for military families" tent in the courtyard.

This is what I'm pondering:
1. My Mountain Dew can says "mtn dew". Is "mtn dew" hipper than "Mountain Dew"?
2. Will I carve a mean pumpkin or a silly pumpkin this year?
3. A mean pumpkin, of course. I only carve mean pumpkins. Which maybe has something to do with my childhood.
4. I do really like hot dogs.
5. And Cheetos.
6. But not mtn dew so much.

i probably don't have tetanus - but bears could be anywhere

Now, lockjaw's something I probably don't worry about often enough.

In fact it's not on the list of things I regularly worry about at all. If you could count all the incidences of worrying that I engage in during the course of a year, you would probably find "Raphael's been attacked by a gang of ruffians (or other) while biking home from school at three o'clock in the morning and no one has found him yet is it time to call the cops?" at the top of the list, followed closely by "bears", and, after that, "mountain lions".

But lockjaw is somewhere on a different list altogether. It's on the "Things I SHOULD Be Worried About Such As, For Example, Lockjaw And Accidentally Hitting A Bicyclist During Rush Hour" List.

Because I'm an archaeologist, right, and we're constantly picking up pointy metal debris and climbing barbed wire fences and sorting through piles of old structural material is why I ought to think more about lockjaw. Or maybe not lockjaw per se (which kills one out of five people, by the way - did you know this? And not tell me?) but definitely tetanus vaccinations.

As it is, I think about tetanus vaccinations only on days like today when I am closing a gate and get punctured by barbed wire. The first thing I think is: "Did I get my last tetanus shot in 1998 or 1999?" And then after that, all my other thoughts go straight downhill, and I will tell you it's hard to be an effective instructor when someone says to you, "I think I plotted my rock pile on the wrong side of the center line," and your reaction is: "Center line? Rock pile?!? Are you CRAZY? I'M going to get LOCKJAW!" Or someone says, "An ant just crawled up my pants and it BIT me," and your reaction is: "Don't you GET IT?!? I'm going to be DEAD by MONDAY! Or eating through a STRAW! Or WORSE!!!"

Okay, I didn't really think those things. But I did go get vaccinated for tetanus on the way home from work, so at least now I have matching, hurty puncture wounds on both arms. I'm symmetrical. And according to the adorably cute person named Stephanie who vaccinated me at the Walgreens mini-clinic, I should live through the weekend unless a bear gets me.

Oh, and also? I learned how to run a backhoe yesterday. I dug trenches and didn't swing the bucket into the side of anyone's skull or anything. Although I guess that has to go on one list or the other at this point.

the sandwich diaries

This is my lunch:
Two slices of Swiss cheese. Three slices of salami. Mayo. Worst sandwich in the history of sandwiches.

This is why I'm so tired:

After class last night, I went to Bison Witches for beer and sandwiches with four other writing students. I got the stool at the end of the booth which made me the tallest and therefore in charge, but I don't think anyone else was familiar with the rules. I had a Stone IPA. I was so tired to begin with that it almost toppled me off the stool. I didn't get home until 11:00 (the Witching Hour). Class ended at nine o'clock (the Bison Witching Hour). But it was totally worth it.

so lonesome i could cry - or at least make out with my computer a little

Living in Tucson makes for a variety of oxymoronic situations. Preparing basil lemon syrup for cocktails on the patio later in the evening (because it's 98 degrees again) after having purchased the Halloween candy comes to mind. I don't know which way is up anymore, frankly.

In unrelated news, I'm not really that lonesome, although I have been spending WAAAAAY too much time with my computer lately. Not blogging, obviously, but that doesn't make it better.

It's true what they say about architecture students. Once they enter the program, they apparently vaporize. Like vampires when they do that thing where they wrap their cape around themselves and vanish in a puff of smoke, and then a wolf howls and a bat flutters up into the shadows and everyone's all like OMG, did you see that? Did that guy in the cape just disappear, or was that a trick of the light? Do you think the bat is just a coincidence? Am I drunk? What's happening? Or whatever.

Only with architecture students, it's not sunlight they worry about. It's normal, daily routines such as doing the drive-through ATM at the bank or arriving home before three in the morning. If an architecture student is exposed to normal, daily life, he swirls a big sheet of vellum around himself and disappears in a cloud of eraser crumbles. And then, instead of a bat, you see the architecture student himself hunched up real small around his laptop, scurrying back to the safety of his cubicle.

At least that's my impression.

In fact, the architecture people over in Raphael's department told his class that a lot of relationships in which one half of the relationship is an architecture student don't make it through the five year program. I think we'll be okay, but it's true that I am alone a lot these days and that I have turned to the computer for companionship. So far we're just friends, but you know how these things can go.

Here's what I've been up to since Raphael left me for Auto Cad:

I've been looking for plane tickets for the holidays.

I've spent a great deal of time memorizing the Anthropologie website in case I have money ever again.

I've spent probably hours on itunes. I would totally make out with itunes if it were at all possible. If my mother, for example, wants to buy me stuff for Christmas, an itunes gift card is an excellent idea. I'm just saying.

I'm Googling things, of course. I'm Banking. I'm YouTubing.

I'm educating myself by watching old South Park episodes because I never watched South Park the first time around and conversations keep going there for some reason.

I'm Facebooking intermittently. (Although Facebook makes me feel vaguely inadequate. Mainly I get on there and look around for three minutes before panicking at all the conversations I've fallen behind on and the birthdays I've missed and the groups I meant to join and the various applications I've forgotten to manage and then I run away. The guilt is staggering.)

I also check my email every twenty-five minutes, just in case. No one writes to me except the Gap and, for some reason, Walgreens, but I like to make sure. What if Walgreens wants to hang out? I'd sure hate to miss that opportunity.

What I'm NOT doing is blogging, homework, or, in general, anything constructive. I'm also not making out with my computer, but if Raphael doesn't get home in time for dinner tonight, that may change.